Your spouse wants to file for divorce: what should you do?

  • 02, 28, 2018
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  •  Family 
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    If you and your partner decided to get married because you dreamed about sharing your life together, you probably never imagined that it would be a time when one of you would want to file for divorce. However, as many divorce cases prove it, time changes everything so even though you only experience positive feelings for your spouse during the first year of marriage, troubling times, differences, monotony and infidelity start settling comfortably in your home and you end up only with anger, disappointment, bitterness and frustration in your soul. The only problem is that you are not the one who thinks about a definitive separation, your spouse does. In fact, you are the one who is willing to do anything it takes in order to save the marriage, but how can you change someone’s mind, especially when it comes to such an important decision? How can you erase everything and make a fresh start or you should start looking for the best divorce attorneys?

    How you should handle the situation

    You cannot fight alone meaning that you must show the initiative of engaging in a meaningful conversation with your partner so that you discover the exact reasons compelling him or her to make such a decision that will completely change your life. Try to remain calm, understanding and supportive. Maybe your spouse does have solid reasons that perfectly explain this action. Maybe you are at fault, but you never realized it. Did you give your spouse enough attention during the years spent together, especially during hard times? Did you remain faithful even when you had the perfect opportunity to cheat? Did you listen to your spouse’s complaints and did something to mend your mistakes? After discussing about the topic and finding out the reasons, you should take a moment alone and decide if you still have chances to save your marriage. Try to analyze your spouse’s reactions or simply ask whatever you need to know because at this point, none of you should hide things. You can even consider therapy if you believe that it could change the situation, but keep your self-respect and show respect to your spouse regarding of his or her final decision.

    Things that you should not do in such a situation

    If your partner expresses his or her strong wish of leaving the marriage, you have to keep your composure and find the strength to move on. However, if you know that you still have a shot to redeem yourself, take it. Under no circumstances you should start begging or making demands because this will not persuade your spouse to give up his or her decision. In fact, it is a pathetic tactic that can only cause pity. Do not smother your partner during this period just to show that you still exist; give your spouse the needed space and time to think about the next move. Do not start giving presents, saying every hour “I love you” and taking with friends or family to help you out.

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